**WARNING: THIS BLOG CONTAINS DISCUSSION ABOUT CHILDHOOD SEXUAL ABUSE WHICH MAY TRIGGER SOME READERS. IF THIS IS YOU PLEASE STOP HERE AND MAKE THE DECISION ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT YOU WISH TO CONTINUE READING OR MOVE ON. THANK YOU.
Yesterday was just…well, one of those days. We have a conjunction between Mercury and Mars in fiery Leo that will be exact on Monday, July 9, but is within three degrees of each other right now. Communications are moving fast and hot and this conjunction is now close enough for the fire brigade to be at the ready! I offer you this tale as both a manifestation of this energy and, more importantly, as a dive into the topic of professional responsibility and ethical communications within the context of spiritual arts.
A video was put out by an professional astrologer I have followed on YouTube for about a year. He currently has ninety four thousand subscribers on this channel. He comes off as a spiritual practitioner. In this video he was talking about the energies of the New Moon Solar Eclipse in Cancer on July 2 and started to ramble about healing your childhood wounds. All well and good.
However, he then got into a discussion about the wounds of childhood sexual abuse. He said that these are difficult to heal because, at bottom, the child experiences pleasure by being aroused during an abuse event. He used the phrase, “because it feels good.”
This stopped me in my tracks and I was appalled. First of all, he throws out this topic as if it’s just a small thing to add to his chatter without considering that many people viewing may have deep trauma around this topic, then he actually states that a sexually abused child experiences pleasure. Where to begin?
When I commented that I felt he was very wrong and that I hoped the Mercury retrograde time will offer him an opportunity to RE-view this video and offer an apology to his viewers he replied thusly: “It’s in every psychology and biological book that the physical body responds with chemicals from the brain when sexually stimulated. You’re in denial.”
He deleted that comment about 20 minutes later and then posted some cut and paste commentary about all the hormones that are released (even though children’s endocrines systems are not developed) that create pleasure biologically when touched in a sexual manner. Never mind that children, especially pre-verbal infants, are still negotiating life through their energetic body which is their primary guidance system. They will know intuitively that this person touching them intends them harm and they will go into fear mode which is far stronger than some biological pleasure. They will be afraid, not aroused.
There were two other women who challenged him but he may not have read their replies before mine. He did not reply to either of them and he never returned to commenting.
I share this because this astrologer is not, in my opinion, professional or an ethical practitioner. He is ignorant and self-absorbed at best. His reply to someone who questions him about his off-handed remarks about childhood sexual abuse through making attempts to defend this type of commentary with clearly no real knowledge of the topic, sensitivity to his viewing audience, and includes victim blaming (“You’re in denial”) into his defense is what brings me here to write this blog.
For the most part, many who are in the profession of providing professional readings are not trained therapists or psychologists. Yet we find ourselves in the position of hearing deep stories from our clients that are filled with pain and sorrow. And we always have to assume that we are not hearing the worst of the worst. So we must tread lightly when we see what we see within a chart or spread. It takes a long time to really learn the art of tact and discretion.
As practitioners we are absolutely accountable for what and how we share information with our clients or subscribers. Period. Sure, we have some days where we get stuck. Maybe it’s a Mercury retrograde that has us reeling and we just say all the wrong things. If we get called out, then we have an ethical responsibility to look at our position and consider whether or not we feel we may need to adjust. Apologizing is the mature response even if you feel that you were not incorrect! Someone was distressed by something you said and you can still apologize. Defending and backtracking and ESPECIALLY engaging in something like blaming and shaming the person involved is reprehensible and points to the fact that it might be time to take a break from what we are doing and heal our own soul. This is not the profile of a professional and could seriously damage someone.
If you are someone who goes to tarot readers or astrologers and you hear something like this that is clearly wrong you are NOT obligated to continue in a session with the reader. If you are a subscriber to someone’s blog or YouTube channel, you have every right to call them out on this type of uninformed commentary. We do our best to try to educate rather than berate, but if we are triggered we might come out guns a-blazing. In all instances when we are with someone who claims to be a “spiritual healer” and engages in unethical behaviour it is best to simply stand up and speak up and hope that they will wake up.
If you have questions or feedback please feel free to contact me either through comments here or via a personal message. I will be happy to respond.
Take care of yourselves, friends. May you go gently into these tumultuous times.
Be well and Namaste.